Today, and every day, we celebrate women and non-binary people across the globe.
In honour of International Women’s Day, we sat down with 5 influential kiwi women to discuss embracing sexual wellness, empowerment and love advice for their younger selves.
Sarah Lindsay
Sarah is the powerhouse behind Auckland’s fitness studio and mindfulness space, SALA
What's your message to women on International Women's Day about embracing sexual wellness?
Not to underestimate the power of sexual wellness. As a society we are gaining clarity on ways to prioritise our mental health; boundary setting, sleep, meditation etc, but I think pleasure and sexual wellness is still underrepresented. Sex (or pleasure) boosts serotonin, can reduce anxiety and improves sleep. Just see it as another valuable tool in your holistic living life kit.
Are you noticing a shift in women's sexual empowerment and how do you hope this will develop in the future?
I think the media is influencing our definition of sexual empowerment, and although this is an overall positive, I think it can also create a stereotype of what sexuality looks like. To embrace intimacy and sexuality doesn’t mean becoming hyper sexualised (unless that feels authentic to you). It can be as simple as having open conversations with yourself, and your partners about your preferences and how to meet one another’s needs. I think conversation is the first step to stamping out taboo fuelled pleasure barriers.
What sex/love advice would you give to your younger self?
A partner doesn’t need to love you, but they do need to respect you. Sex doesn’t need to be reserved for ‘love’, you can have fun without commitments, and as long as you respect one another it won’t take a toll on your self esteem.
Instagram: @salayoga
Website: sala.studio
YouTube: click here
Victoria Harris
Victoria is the co-founder of The Curve, an investing education platform for women.
What's your message to women on International Women's Day about embracing sexual wellness?
Sexual wellness is all about embracing your sexuality and having confidence in yourself. It’s empowering and forms a vital part of our overall well being. For most of us, sexual wellness is a continual work in progress. Everyday, particularly on IWD, we should be actively improving our sexual wellness through better communication, understanding and awareness when it comes to our bodies.
Are you noticing a shift in women's sexual empowerment and how do you hope this will develop in the future?
Yes, but slowly. The more women openly talk about their sexual wellbeing, the more quickly
they will become sexually empowered. Open communication, with partners and other women, will remove the 'taboo' around sex and lead to more open dialouges around sexual wellness. This will lead to younger generations being able to lead much more sexually fulfilled lives.
What sex/love advice would you give to your younger self?
So much! I wish I was more in touch with my sexual wellness from an earlier age. It is something I am still learning to embrace each day. Some advice for my younger self would be to have confidence in yourself, embrace your body, love your body and don't be afraid to be different. Different is beautiful.
Instagram: @the_curvenz
Website: thecurve.co.nz
Sophie Hallwright
Sophie is the co-founder of The Curve, an investing education platform for women.
What's your message to women on International Women's Day about embracing sexual wellness?
Our sexuality isn't linear - it's a never ending journey of discovering and then rediscovering what feels right in our bodies. Over the past year I have spent a lot of time, love and energy getting to know my own body, what turns me on, what feels natural for me - if I had a message to anyone who identifies as a women on International Women's Day, it would be that listening to your body is one of the most powerful things we can do. The confidence and pleasure I have discovered by slowing down and spending time with myself, has really transformed my sexuality. There are so many resources and wonderfully sexually liberated people who can help if you don't know where to start. I have spent a lot of time with a holistic sexuality coach over the past year (@melissavranjes) and she gave me so many amazing practices that have helped me creep out of my sexuality shell. I'll be forever grateful for her and everything she has taught me.
Are you noticing a shift in women's sexual empowerment and how do you hope this will develop in the future?
Totally! I think there is an overall shift towards accepting that women are multifaceted and just because a woman is delicate, it doesn't mean she can't also be powerful. Just because she feels comfortable being naked and sexy, doesn't mean she can't also be intelligent. Just because she is intuitive, doesn't mean she can't also be a leader. I hope this duality continues to be celebrated and that we rewrite what it means to be a woman in this world. Traditionally to lead a company, or be 'successful' in a business sense (as a women) we have had to get harder. To be less emotional and really sit in our masculine energy. I hope to see that change, to celebrate what makes us women - knowing that the emotive, sensitive, empathetic sides of the divine feminine are strengths when it comes to leadership and business. Reminding both women to step into that power, and men to create space for us to lead differently.
What sex/love advice would you give to your younger self?
Experiment! Be proud of your body. Let your hair down. Grab someone else's. Learn about the energy inside of you, and don't take it all too seriously.
Instagram: @the_curvenz
Website: thecurve.co.nz
Stacey O’Gorman
Stacey O'Gorman is a Women’s Holistic Sexuality Mentor. Stacey studies Holistic Sexuality full time whilst mentoring women around the world 1:1, and educating through workshops, talks and podcasts.
What's your message to women on International Women's Day about embracing sexual wellness?
I believe our sexual energy is our life force. Meaning our radiance, our joy, our zestiness and our pleasure.
When I have neglected my sexual needs, desires, boundaries and ultimately my pleasure in the past, it has affected so much more than just my sex life. I have felt emotionally flat, my hormonal health has been all over the show and my overall state of being has been diluted, as if there is a light switched off inside of me.
Sexual wellness to me looks like unlearning and re-educating myself around what sex looks like, and putting it into practice. This work has felt deeply honouring and respectful for myself and has helped me heal and look at life with an entirely new lens.
Taking care of our sexuality and pleasure takes attention, love and care. And trust me, it is so, SO worth it. If there is a little niggle or voice inside of you that knows you are capable of more pleasure, liberation and freedom… listen to it. You won’t regret it.
Are you noticing a shift in women's sexual empowerment and how do you hope this will develop in the future?
Absolutely. I think we still have a long way to go but we have come leaps and bounds in the last century.
I had a real moment of joy last week when Vogue posted a pregnant Rihanna at the Dior show at Paris Fashion week wearing the sexiest lingerie attire.
Our society places so much judgment and expectation on women at our various stages of life. What we should and shouldn’t wear, how we should and shouldn’t be, what’s appropriate and what’s not.
This was so much more than just a sexy look. For me, it completely redefined maternity dressing and was a sign of progress and freedom. And it made my heart sing!
As we move forward I hope that we can continue to grow, evolve and normalise conversations around sex and pleasure in a way that is diverse and accessible so that everyone can feel more freedom and joy within themselves.
What sex/love advice would you give to your younger self?
Touch yourself before you touch anyone else. Get to know thyself and from that place, communicate, communicate, communicate.
Instagram: @stacey.o.gorman
Website: staceyogorman.com
Morgan Penn
Morgan is a certified Somatic Sexologist, Pleasure Advocate, Sex Educator and co-host of the award-winning podcast The Trainee Sexologist.
What's your message to women on International Women's Day about embracing sexual wellness?
This glorious body is yours and yours alone. It is wired for pleasure and it is our job to find out what makes it feel alive and yummy. Pleasure is our birthright and to reclaim our body in this way is a rebellious act in a time where women still get shamed or judged for self pleasure.
It's time to reclaim authentic desire, openly enjoy sex and celebrate your sexuality.
Are you noticing a shift in women's sexual empowerment and how do you hope this will develop in the future?
I am, which gives me hope for our next generation. But we still have a big job ahead of us. I want pleasure to be taught as part of the sex-ed curriculum so that our youth stop thinking that other people are responsible for our pleasure and instead know how to have a really delicious time by ourselves. I want talking about a vulva to be the same as talking about a knee. Normalisation of healthy sexuality.
What sex/love advice would you give to your younger self?
Sex whether by yourself or with another person is a sacred act and should be treated as such. Honour the pussy, really feel into what she wants. No is a complete sentence... say it more often. Oh and stop faking orgasms!
Instagram: @morganthesexologist
Website: morganpenn.co.nz
Podcast: The Trainee Sexologist
